Hot Tub Time Machine

This movie is on instant right now and I hadn’t seen it since I watched it in theatres by myself soooo guess what I did on Saturday night??

This movie is so awesome- it’s very self aware comedy. Right after they travel back, Clark Duke (from the online TV show Michael and Clark with Michael Cera) looks at the hot tub and says, “Do I have to be the asshole that says we got in this thing and went back in time?” And instead of going through the requisite asking a local what year it is to confirm their science fiction suspicions, Darrell from the Office (also known as Craig Robinson and in this movie, Nick)  just grabs this woman and says “what color is Michael Jackson?” and when she says, “black” with a confused look on her face they all go “Nooo!!!” To explain all the ‘science’ there’s Clark again who talks about some sort of time wormhole teleportal thing then simply says, “Look, I write Stargate fan fiction so I think I know what I’m talking about.”

The plot of this movie is that a bunch of friends get together to go on a trip after one of them almost commits suicide (maybe accidentally, maybe on purpose) and they go to this ski lodge they used to go to when they were young and get in a hot tub and travel back in time to the 80’s. So basically this is the best movie ever made.

When they get there, some of them flirt with the idea of maybe staying which is soon squashed by John Cusack who reminds them, “No, this is the eighties, we had Reagan and AIDS let’s get the fuck out of here.” So, through their time travel guide/hot tub repairman Chevy Chase, they learn that they’re not supposed to change anything (as it usually is with time travel) then they reference the Butterfly Effect a couple of times. Then  they proceed to change everything. Much to the chagrin of Clark (Jacob) who keeps cautioning, “We’re gonna like, make Hitler president or something.”

There’s all this stuff they’re supposed to do; Darrell has to cheat on his wife and play a show, Rob Corrdry/Lou has to get beaten up by a ski lodge patrol guy who seems to be under the impression they’re in the middle of the Cold War (which for someone who works at a ski lodge is a pretty funny character choice), John Cusack/Adam has to break up with his then gf and get stabbed in the eye with a fork, etc. But they don’t really do any of these things as they originally happened and in the end- we find out that Lou/Rob Corrdry really did try to kill himself (DARK) but then he just changes the future and becomes rich and gives them all great lives. It’s very heartwarming and untaxing to your brain on any level. Like, I fully believe an eight year old could could watch this movie and have no problem comprehending the plot. Which is what I need after the Master/Looper/Pitch Perfect amirite??

Sooo predictably, they run into all these problems, like Rob Corrdry & Darrell- (Lou and Nick) bet on the ending of this football game that is changed because they fucked with time and Lou ends up having to give Nick a blowjob (forget that I said an eight year old could watch this movie without issue) and Lou is just on his knees going, “It’s so black! It’s so impossibly black!” But I won’t spoil it if you haven’t seen it!!! Jk it doesn’t end up happening. But for those thirty seconds, you’re like WTF IS THIS MOVIE. Also, there’s this b-plot going on of this bell boy (Crispin Glover aka Creepy Thin Man from Charlie’s Angels) who when they first checked in doesn’t have an arm, but when they go back in time he does, so the whole movie they’re waiting for when he loses his arm (slightly dark) and he keeps doing all these potentially hazardous activities, like juggling chainsaws while shaving ice sculptures (doesn’t this movie sound awesome????)

There’s clearly like a love interest thing to keep it going, John Cusack meets this writer girl at a Poison concert (Lizzy Caplan- every thinking man’s dream girl) and they have some fun, being sure to highlight how spontaneous it is the whole time. Then basically they all go back after Darrell/Nick plays “I’ve Got A Feeling” by the Black Eyed Peas (making artistic plagiarism seem cool and subversive) by spilling a Russian energy drunk called ‘Chernobly’ (KIND OF DARK) and when they get back they find out that Lou has changed the course of history and Google is now ‘Lougle’ (when he’s considering all the things he could do: “We could combine Twitter with Viagra”) and they’re all really rich and living their dream lives with their dream women. Cute.

Other awesome things about this movie: There is a fight scene set to ‘Hero’ by Enrique Iglesias. The evil ski lodge guy who beats up Lou is obsessed with the movie Red Dawn and thinks everyone is a Russian spy (they do have energy drinks labeled ‘Chernobly’). Nick works as a dog personal trainer at a place called, ‘Sup Dawg’ and one of the first scenes of the movie is him with a bulldog on a tiny treadmill. You’re welcome.

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